Make Yourself - Incubus

If I hadn't made me
I would've been made somehow
if I hadn't assembled myself
I'd have fallen apart by now

If I hadn't made me
I'd be more inclined to bow
powers that be, would have swallowed me up
but that's more than I can allow

If you let them make you
they'll make you paper mache
at a distance you're strong
until the wind comes
then you crumble and blow away

If you let them fuck you
there will be no foreplay
rest assured, they'll screw you complete
till your ass is blue and gray

You should make amends with you
if only for better health, but if you really want to live
why not try and make yourself
make yourself, make yourself

If I hadn't made me
I'd have fallen apart by now
I won't let them make me
it's more than I can allow
so when I make me
I won't be paper mache
and if I fuck me
I'll fuck me in my own way

You should make amends with you
if only for better health,
but if you really want to laugh
why not try and make yourself
make yourself, make yourself
make yourself, make yourself

privilege - Incubus

Isn't it strange that a gift could be an enemy
Isn't it weird that a privilege could feel like a chore
maybe its me, but this life isn't going anywhere
maybe if we looked hard enough we could find a back door
find yourself a back door

I see you in line dragging your feet
you have my sympathy
the day you were born you were born free
that is your privilege

Isn't it strange that the man standing in front of me
doesn't have a clue why he's waiting or what he's waiting for
maybe its me but I'm sick of wasting energy
maybe if I look in my heart, I can find a back a door
find yourself a back door

I see you in line dragging your feet
you have my sympathy
the day you were born you were born free
that is your
that is your privilege

Find yourself a back door

I see you in line dragging your feet
you have my sympathy
the day you were born you were born free
that is your privilege
I see you in line dragging your feet
you have my sympathy
the day you were born you were born free
that is your
that is your privilege
that is your
that is your
that is your privilege

Why not initiate an office dare system - however to do it properly only you are allowed to know the dare.

Sound confusing? Well read on..........

ONE-POINT OFFICE DARES

1) Run one lap around the office at top speed.

2) Groan out loud in the toilet cubicle (at least one other 'non-player' must be in the toilet at the time).

3) Ignore the first five people who say 'good morning' to you.

4) Phone someone in the office you barely know, leave your name and say, "Just called to say I can't talk right now. Bye."

5) To signal the end of a conversation, clamp your hands over your head

6) When someone hands you a piece of paper, finger it, and whisper huskily, "Mmmmmmm, that feels soooooo good!".

7) Leave your zipper open for one hour. If anyone points it out, say, "Sorry, I really prefer it this way".

8) Walk sideways to the photocopier.

9) While riding a lift, gasp dramatically every time the doors open.

THREE-POINT DARES

1) Say to your boss, "I like your style" and shoot him with double-barreled fingers.

2) Babble incoherently at a fellow employee then ask,"Did you get all that, I don't want to have to repeat it".

3) Page yourself over the intercom (do not disguise your voice).

4) Kneel in front of the water cooler and drink directly from the nozzle (there must be a 'non-player' within sight).

5) Shout random numbers while someone is counting.

FIVE POINT DARES

1) At the end of a meeting, suggest that, for once, it would be nice to conclude with the singing of the national anthem (extra points if you actually launch into it yourself).

2) Walk into a very busy person's office and while they watch you with growing irritation, turn the light switch on/off 10 times.

3) For an hour, refer to everyone you speak to as "Bob".

4) Announce to everyone in a meeting that you "really have to go do a number two".

5) After every sentence, say 'mon' in a really bad jamaican accent as in "the report's on your desk, mon". Keep this up for one hour.

6) While an office mate is out, move their chair into the lift.

7) In a meeting or crowded situation, slap your forehead repeatedly and mutter, "Shut up, damn it, all of you just shut up!".

8) At lunchtime, get down on your knees and announce, "As God is my witness, I'll never go hungry again."

9) In a colleague's diary, write in 10am: "See how I look in tights".

10) Carry your keyboard over to your colleague and ask "You wanna trade?".

11) Repeat the following conversation 10 times to the same person: "Do you hear that?" "What?" "Never mind, it's gone now".

12) Come to work in army fatigues and when asked why, say, "I can't talk about it".

13) Posing as a maitre d', call a colleague and tell him he's won a lunch for four at a local restaurant. Let him go.

14) Speak with an accent (French, German, Porky Pig, etc) during a very important conference call.

15) Find the vacuum and start vacuuming around your desk.

16) Hang a two-foot long piece of toilet roll from the back of your pants and act genuinely surprised when someone points it out.

17) Present meeting attendees with a cup of coffee and biscuit, smash each biscuit with your fist.

18) During the course of a meeting, slowly edge your chair towards the door.

19) Arrange toy figures on the table to represent each meeting attendee, move them according to the movements of their real-life counterparts.

And if that wasn't enough for you here is some examples of insane acts you can use anywhere...

1) At lunchtime, sit in your parked car with sunglasses on and point a hairdryer at passing cars. See if they slow down.

2) Tell your children over dinner. "Due to the economy, we are going to have to let one of you go."

3) Every time someone asks you to do something, ask if they want fries with that.

4) Put your rubbish bin on your desk and label it "IN."

5) Put decaf in the coffee maker for 3 weeks. Once everyone has gotten over his or her caffeine addictions, switch to espresso.

6) In the subject field for all your e-mails, write "FOR SEXUAL FAVOURS".

7) Finish all your sentences with "In accordance with the prophecy."

8Dont use any punctuation

9) As often as possible, skip rather than walk.

10) Ask people what sex they are. Laugh hysterically after they answer.

11) Specify that your drive-through order is "to go."

12) Sing along at the opera.

13) Go to a poetry recital and ask why the poems don't rhyme.

14) Put mosquito netting around your work area. Play a tape of jungle sounds all day.

15) Five days in advance, tell your friends you can't attend their party because you're not in the mood.

16) Have your co-workers address you by your wrestling name, Rock Hard.

17) When the money comes out of the ATM, scream "I Won! I Won! 3rd time this week!!!"

18) When leaving the zoo, start running towards the parking lot yelling,"Run for your lives, they're loose!"